The UnNatural Mother’s Guide To Parenting On A Hangover

Picture of Becci With a Hangover

Yes, you have seen a very similar picture to this before in my post from last year 5 Things I Have Learnt The Morning After The Night Before. The problem being I don’t seem to have learnt from my mistakes and If anything I have surpassed myself and have the worst hangover of my entire life. This could be due to the fact that before going out last night the only thing I had consumed all day was a bag of Quavers. Between football practice, kids parties and just trying to keep 2 children alive, finding time to eat didn’t quite happen. Don’t worry though I made up for it last night by eating a steak as big as my head ( but I was already 2 cocktails and a glass of wine in by this point  ). So, here’s The UnNatural Mother’s Guide To Parenting On A Hangover.

  1. Brew a pot of coffee and drink a large cup  ( then nearly throw up as you had 3 Espresso Martini’s instead of dessert last night and the taste is making you want to vomit )
  2. Allow the oldest child to eat the entire contents of the party bag from friends party yesterday ( It’s a scientific fact that Paw Patrol Birthday cake counts towards their 5 a day )
  3. Loving make your husband a cup of tea and take it up to him in bed ( what he doesn’t know is it contains coconut milk as in the tinned stuff and it’s your revenge for him refusing to get up with the kids. The last of the normal milk has just been used to make yourself a brew )
  4. Set up an Easter Shoe Hunt ( The naughty Easter Bunny has hidden one of mummy’s Jimmy Choo Shoes, she’s 99% sure she was wearing both shoes when she left the restaurant but can’t be sure. 1st one to find the shoe wins a chocolate biscuit )
  5. Remove last night’s underwear from smallest child’s head ( In doing so find missing shoe along with your’s & your husband’s entire outfits from last night from down the back of the couch.Look very confused as neither you or your husband know why your outfits are there ???? )
  6. Prepare a healthy breakfast to soak up the alcohol ( full fry up complete with chips, I’m classy like that )
  7. Have an impromptu PJ Day  ( not a chance am I tackling trying to dress 2 kids today )
  8. Take a long shower ( you would have preferred to do this alone but 2 children and a teddy bear in a space no bigger than a postage stamp is fine too )
  9. Make a note to apologise to your youngest child’s Nursery Teacher who you saw in the restaurant ( She asked had you enjoyed your meal, at no point did she ask for career advice which you were readily dishing out to her )
  10. Offer to make the Sunday roast ( that way you can sneak a glass of wine while you cook and take the edge off  your splitting head )

I hope you have enjoyed my survival guide.Please feel free to comment below with your tips & tricks for parenting on a hangover. I would love to say I will learn from my mistakes but let’s face it there will definitely be another post like this in the future.

 

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17 responses to “The UnNatural Mother’s Guide To Parenting On A Hangover”

  1. Jo says:

    ahhaha this really made me laugh, sounds like you do hangovers brilliantly. I must remember hunt the shoe to keep my daughter entertained #postsfromtheheart

  2. Olivia says:

    Hahaha – Add ‘throwing up in the kitchen sink surrounded by your breakfast munching babies is absolutely acceptable, even though your husband disagrees’… Oh the shame! Great read!

  3. Ha, Love this! I’m only 7 months in so have only had a handful of parenting with hangover days. Can totally relate to the fear of what I have said to others. You give much less of a monkeys as a parent! #PostsFromTheHeart

  4. Thankfully I only need 1 glass of wine to get drunk so no hangover happens 🙂 #PostsFromTheHeart

  5. Haha there is nothing worse than parenting on a hangover. For that reason I never drink these days, unless we are away for the weekend and I can guarantee that I wont have to deal with noisy children the following day! #postsfromtheheart

  6. Laura says:

    Hahaha great post! I literally cannot think of anything worse than a hangover with kids screaming and being demanding! I have to plan in advance for my partner to be home the next morning so he can help me! hahaha I’ve bumped into a woman who used to run my local children’s centre group once & she was an absolute mess, she didn’t seem keen on talking to me the following week! #PostsFromTheHeart

  7. There is nothing worse than a bad hangover with kids. NOTHING.

    #postsfromtheheart

  8. Ruth Drake says:

    Brilliant post! Having a hangover is my least favourite time to be a Mummy EVER 🙂

  9. Tina says:

    haha I never go out unless I can have someone to have the kids in another house…given my son get up between 5-6 (at 9 years old) it’s not even worth contemplating!! #PostsFromTheHeart

  10. Love this and totally agree – PJ day all the way!

  11. fridgesays says:

    #postsfromtheheart okay, forget the kids and sanity – lets get my first love straight…did you find Jimmy? was Jimmy safe, sound and now back in box until you go out again some time near Christmas (if your going out out is nyhting like my life after motherhood), please update me on Jim

    • The UnNatural Mother says:

      Jimmy was found , flung behind the sofa with mine & hubby’s clothes ?????? I cant remember and neither can Hubby but i think things may have got a bit steamy on the couch . Ha ha ha

  12. This is hilarious… each one was funnier than the last! This has only ever happened to me once, and thank goodness I had my husband AND my folks there to help with my child (and me)… because being a first timer I don’t know how I would’ve survived the morning (read, “day”) after!!! 😀 #PostsFromTheHeart

  13. ahahaah i love this! I’m yet to have a hangover since Ben but im desperate for a big night out yet dont think i could face the repercussions! #PostsFromTheHeart

  14. Haha brilliant! I’ve yet to have this but I think it won’t be too long before I revisit your page for some hangover tips!! #PostsFromTheHeart

  15. Crummy Mummy says:

    There’s absolutely nothing worse than parenting on a hangover is there?! #postsfromtheheart

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