- Don’t Kid yourself that dressing the mini people in Xmas themed outfits will make them feel ‘Christmassy’. Nothing will stop these kids from moaning.
- Don’t fantasise that carrying the youngest in a sling will mean you can lovingly hold hands with your 4-year-old while shopping. What will actually happen is the youngest will spend the whole trip sticking their fingers up your nose and the 4-year-old will not only refuse to hold your hand but will also practice his Usain Bolt impression whenever you get near a road.
- Don’t think just because you asked the 4yr old what he wanted to do today and he answered ‘ buy some Christmas Decorations’ he actually wanted to go and buy any. Instead what he wanted you to do is get everyone ready , drive to the next town , walk to the shops , pick decorations and then throw a full-scale tantrum at the checkout as you are paying (total waste of £30 ) because he wanted to go to the ‘ Bouncy Place’ and not shopping !!!
- Don’t forget that even though you checked 6 times if the 4-year-old needed a wee before you left the house he will need to go twice during the 20 minutes you are in the shop.
- Don’t after scooping the 4 year old off the floor, snapping the strap on the baby sling ( so you now need to hold the youngest in place ) , struggle to carry 2 bags of decorations while guiding the 4 yr old by the hood of his coat to the car , DON’T put the decorations on the pavement while you strap the youngest into the car seat because what will now happen is the 4 yr old will trip over , fall onto the bags and break all the baubles and squash the cream cake you have just purchased to ease the pain of the last hour.
The Moral of this story is just don’t , never ever , ever again !!!